The never ending goodbye

I easily could say that I never had the perspective before my mission of what good-bye meant! Leaving a host of family and friends behind in Colorado I thought was a big deal and hard enough. Little did i realize that other members of the church, investigators, recent converts, fellow missionaries, and various others would mean so much to me through my journey as a missionary! Let it be known that this is why the mission is the most bitter sweet experience of my life! I call it the DREAM :) !! Last night our mission just sent home a group of faithful returned missionaries and it was another time to "tear off" a band-aid. As I contemplated on this reoccuring pattern of "saying good-bye" this poem came to mind

I’ve said good-bye a thousand times.

Each mother does,

Then, patient, praying, waits at home.

I said good-bye

When toddler’s feet first moved

Beyond safe whitewashed kitchen door,

When youthful hands

Found Joseph’s dark oak bench and tools

To practice craft of carpenter,

When joyful boy discovered

God’s will writ bold in temple text

And heard bright angels’ promises.

I said good-bye

When John baptized him in the stream

And a lone white dove descended

As emblem of his Father’s love,

When faith turned water into wine

And every miracle in turn

Confirmed that he was God’s

Not mine.

I said good-bye

When neighbor’s stone turned sharp,

Ears closed against his tongue,

And mocking people drove him

From green Galilee.

And finally

Standing in the empty crowd

I saw stupidity not men

Pound spikes into his gentle hands

And cursing lift him up

To goad and mock out loud

Until I said good-bye a thousand times

And fresh salt tears poured down

To mark the ground that we were left upon.

Good-bye my son.

I will be lonely

But not alone.

Good-bye my son.

We’ll wait for you

At home.